professor

Prominent Professor Says He Does Heroin…and thats OKAY

Columbia University endorses recreational Heroin use, one prominent professor just wrote a book about it. He does heroin all the time and he’s not a strung out junkie, yet, he insists. He doesn’t want to put his pipe down though.

Tenured professor of psychology

Carl Hart, PhD isn’t the kind of professor you would want to be stuck on Gilligan’s island with. Instead of turning a couple coconuts and some parts from the FM radio into a nuclear reactor or something, he would be off in the bushes whining in withdrawal pains. Hand him a coconut and he’d try to smoke it.

Everyone knows that the liberal left has totally seized control of higher education in an effort to produce generation after generation of well-programmed zombies. Nobody pays much attention until one of the wacky academics comes up with some new and improved nonsense.

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Hart “was the first tenured African American professor of sciences at Columbia University” and he works in the Psychology and Neuroscience department. Timothy Leary was in the psych department too.

Professor Hart doesn’t care very much for those wussie psychedelic users. He encourages his students to go hard-core or go home. Advocates of the psychedelic movement call themselves “psychonauts.” They have established that mushrooms, mescaline and other hallucinogens can effectively relieve depression long-term from only one or two doses.

To Hart, “the term psychonaut in itself is another attempt to dissociate middle-class psychedelic users from users of drugs such as crack and heroin, who are disapprovingly called ‘crackheads’ or ‘dope fiends.'” He likes to take a trip without leaving the farm but soft drugs like pot aren’t enough for him.

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Contaminated drug consumption

Addicts don’t overdose because of steadily increasing tolerance Professor Hart argues. It’s because the drugs are stepped on. The only thing that makes him think twice about shooting up before class is wondering if this is the dose with too much Fentanyl in it.

“A regulated market, with uniform quality standards, would virtually put an end to contaminated drug consumption and greatly reduce fatal, accidental overdoses.”

“There aren’t many things in life that I enjoy more than a few lines by the fireplace at the end of the day,” the professor romantically describes.

He won’t say a word about what it’s like to crawl around on the carpet looking for breadcrumbs, little pieces of plastic or anything else that looks like that crack fragment you’re convinced after the stash is gone that you dropped an hour ago.

According to the liberal professor, “recreational drug use is a fundamental human right.” Arresting people for drug related crimes dis-proportionally affects people of color, so drug laws are racist and have to go. “Adults should be permitted the legal right to sell, purchase, and use recreational drugs of their choice.” Not all conservatives are upset with the good doctor.

Bible reading evangelicals in the Republican party and all the gun toting second amendment types are ready to lynch the progressive for even suggesting such a nasty thing. Libertarians, on the other hand, have been saying exactly the same thing for decades, just not for the same reasons.

Personal responsibility has room for recreational drugs, even the worst ones and the government should stay out of it. As long as used responsibly, without robbing old ladies to support a habit.

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